Eat
My Feet
This post is for all the guys, real and
virtual, who have ever said they want to kiss, lick, bite, tickle, rub, suck, wash,
or eat my feet. Gentlemen, be my guest. I have THE most disgusting feet on the
planet. Dancer’s feet. There’s years
of ballet and belly dance under those things. (There’s some men under there
too! :O ). Actually, they’re more like tools than feet. I have hammer toes, ingrown
toenails, calluses, corns, blisters, open wounds, broken bones, premature
Arthritis, dead skin, and permanently blackened heels. Bunions run in my
family. I walk and dance barefoot on surfaces you wouldn’t touch with a 10-foot
pole. My feet are so gross even the podiatrist grimaces when I take my shoes
off. In fact, they’re so untamable, I’ve
given up on them. I no longer bother painting my toenails. That would be like
putting lipstick on the proverbial pig. Besides, 90 percent of the nail polish
disappears after just one show. I don’t clip my toenails either, but then
again, they never seem to grow past a certain point. Hah! They probably get
filed down from all the friction that occurs when I dance on wood and concrete
surfaces. I still clean them every so often, although it doesn’t really make a
difference. They just get dirty again. lol